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Wrestling NOT Sex

10/5/2000 The Mat

(October 5, 2000) - Upon reading in the September 15th, 2000 issue of Wrestling USA Magazine the letter to the editor: "Reaction: Girls Wrestling, Where is it Going" by Craig Bennington of Iowa, I was compelled to respond to some of the outlandish assumptions and correlations he made between girls wrestling boys and sexual mores.

First, let me say, that I too think it is more desirable for women to wrestle other women, but based on totally different reasons than the irrational fears given by Bennington. As more woman teams come into existence this will become the ideal situation, from the stand point of a purely "physical" equality perspective.

However, to say that there are potential sexual dangers that exist because a girl wrestles a boy is ridiculous! The writer says, "when a teenage boy has been allowed to "feel up" a girl during wrestling practice it is near impossible for him to understand WHY he cannot do the same while on a date! You are kidding right? Do you really think boys are that simple minded? That reasoning is akin to saying that a boy cannot discriminate between a "cartoon" character who has, let's say, the ability to fly and realizing that HE does NOT have the same capability in real life! Mr. Bennington, since when is executing a wrestling move on an opponent in practice the same as "copping a feel"? I can tell you from experience, a crossface cradle can no way be confused with sexual foreplay! Perhaps, Mr Bennington and others of this mind, need to sit in on the sexuality unit I teach in my health class, to understand that wrestling and sex are not the same! Wrestling, and serious practice to hone ones skills is also NOT sexual experimentation as he implied. Lets give young boys some credit for knowing the difference.

Placing a girl on a mat with a boy is not morally inappropriate as was stated...What IS inappropriate is not teaching boys that an opponent is an opponent, and if you lose- be it to a male or female, it was because they were better, plain and simple! What IS inappropriate are macho coaches who call their athletes "girls" as a derogatory remark to imply being "inferior" This is what perpetrates the aforementioned neanderthal thinking!

As for ill fitting singlets for girls, all that means, is that we need more sporting good companies to respond to the apparel demands of the female athlete. Bennington writes: " Do they (parents) not care about the thoughts and actions that are precipitated by what their daughter is revealing?" Whoa! When did it become the girls' responsibility to "control" the thoughts and behavior of another? That sounds frighteningly similar to the mentality that blames the rape victim for wearing a short skirt!

If you want, Mr. Bennington, to see an end to girl vs. boys wrestling then the female desiring to wrestle must have the ready option of an all female team and this obviously will take time. Until then, all people should be able to pursue the occupation, sport or life of their dreams. No one male or female should be held back from becoming what they want to become just because there are people who cannot distinguish between a contact sport and sex; or from those who believe that a boys' ego is so frail that they cannot handle a loss- God forbid to a girl! Perhaps THAT is the boys' issue not the girls, and maybe he needs to toughen up! Become better, that would solve that problem ha! Let's get over it all ready, and JUST WRESTLE!

Yours In Wrestling,
Carol Carrozza